Current Story of My (Work) Life

Right kids, we have something to tell you. Remember how 6 months ago we said that mummy and daddy love each other and are definitely NOT splitting up? Well, we think it's better for everyone including you kids, if we DID split up. So yeah, we will be splitting up and are now preparing for how to split up, divide up our belongings, properties, even friends... Oh and of course you kids have to decide which parent you want to live with. Obviously as parents, we will make the final decision as to which parent would be more suitable for you to live with, but we will take your preference into account. Yes, we will consider which parent you feel closer to, have more in common with, who you would get along better with going forward. But you will have to choose, we know it's hard and each of the kids will have to make their own decision, independently of the other siblings. So you need to let mummy and daddy know by the weekend so that we can start planning for the holidays and how we are going to be spending it and with whom. OK?